Teresa D.

Last summer I spent some time out of state giving my friend relief from full time caretaker of her mother who was 91. They were in a beautiful area of the Smokey Mountains. Generally we would each work 5 days on and 5 days off. Duties included, preparing breakfast, lunch, & dinner, and being on call during the night via an intercom system to make sure she was safe going to the bathroom. Driving to the doctor, shopping, some cleaning, attending a collection of bird feeders.

I grew up after school and over the summer at my grandparents house. They had a big veggie garden and fruit trees, and several flower gardens. When I was older we stayed close, visits and phone. My experience was with my grandparents, spread out over the years. I always went over to wash and roll her hair. I used to take her grocery shopping. When she became unable to do the walking for herself, I just took her list and went shopping for her every week. My grandfather developed dementia and they lived at home until she slipped and broke her hip. They both became nursing home residents. I was there almost every day or very often, because I was alarmed at the problems I witnessed. My grandfather was in the memory loss unit and died there shortly after. Although grieving, She became a little better, and moved into an assisted living efficiency apartment in a large community. I would still go and do hair washing and rolling, & haircuts, as well as shopping. We would walk around the grounds, she would be on the scooter. I had a young son and little dog that I brought with me often. Eventually she got sick and was in the nursing home for a couple of years before she passed. She never walked again after that, so we went for walks with me pushing her wheelchair. She loved birds and flowers so we could always find something to look at and talk about.